Time to Face Reality!
by Birdhouse in your Soul
Summary: In an extremely strange incident, two ordinary teenagers are teleported to Halloween Town. At first they are having a blast, but then they get caught up in an elaborate plan to take over the world. Note: REALLY OLD STUFF, here. It's not that good.
1. It all started like this

**As said in the summary, I wrote this a really long time ago. So, it's not really that great. Some of the later chapters are pretty funny, though. *shrugs***

**Also, I bring in a ton of people from Final Fantasy, Star Wars, Transformers, and the like, but the main focus is TNBC, so I didn't make it a crossover.**

**I'll shut up now so you can read.**

* * *

It was a complete random accident. I was sitting, staring boredly into space, and Callie was playing her GameBoy, and we were both so caught up in what we were doing that we didn't notice our surroundings suddenly change...

I heard a bark, and thinking it was Terra, Callie's dog, I looked up. I yelled and jumped back when I saw something that was all to familiar to me, but I wouldn't have expected it in a million years.

Zero.

I reached behind me for something to fall on, but my hand fell through the air and, dumbstruck, I fell off something rather tall and hit the ground. I stood up, popping my shoulder back into place, and looked up. I had apparently fallen off the spiral hill.

It's bigger in real life...

I heard Callie gasp and go, "WHOA!! Whaddid you DO, Meghan?"

"What's it look like I did? I fell!"

"No, not that... we're... in halloween town?"

"Looks like it."

"AWESOME!"

"No! Not awesome!" I said, grimacing at the pain in my shoulder. "I fell!"

"..."

"..."

"Who cares?!" Callie replied, and jumped off the hill, landing upright on her feet like a cat. "Let's go find Jack."

I rolled my eyes and followed her.

_______________________________

Sure enough, we found Jack standing in the town square, staring at something. He was also taller than we had speculated, as we only came up to his elbow.

"Hi Jack," Callie said cheerfully.

He continued staring off into space.

Callie frowned and cupped her hands to her mouth like a megaphone. "JACK SKELL-ING-TON!!!!!!!"

"WHO, WHAT?!?!? I DIDN'T DO IT!!!" He yelled, spinning around so fast he almost fell over. He stood there for a minute, staring at us. "Who the heck are YOU?!"

"I could ask you the same thing," Callie said in a smug dramatic voice.

Jack sweatdropped.

"Callie... You obviously know who he is, so that line doesn't work... Retard..."

"Shut up."

"Um, yyyeeeaaahhh.... I'm just gonna, ya know... go over there..."

"Hey, wait! We're not creepy stalkers, I promise. We just somehow ended up here and...yeah."

From the look on his face, it was apparent that Jack was just as confused as I was. And it really looked as though he wanted to get away from us.

"You still haven't answered my question... WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?!?!"

"We're exorcists!!!" Callie yelled, obviously enjoying herself.

Jack blinked at her and slowly started backing away.

I sighed, exasperated. Callie was NOT helping. "We're not EXORCISTS," I told Jack, casting a dirty look in Callie's direction. "We're just normal kids. AND NO," I said firmly as I saw a sadistic grin creep across Jack's face, "You can't scare us. It's not gonna work."

"Damnit."


	2. And Continued

"You'll need costumes if you're gonna blend in," Jack told us. "Otherwise, everyone else will have a nervous breakdown. No humans have ever set foot in Halloween Town."

"Well what do you suggest?!" I asked him, annoyed.

"I really don't know, it's kinda up to you guys..."

"OOH! I WANNA BE A ZOMBIE!!!" Callie yelled, jumping up.

"Yeah, I guess I'll be a zombie too," I said, unable to think of anything else.

"Well then we'd better go visit Doctor Picklestine, he'll be able to make you guys look more... uwh, well, we'd call it NORMAL..."

"Yeah, I get the point. He's not gonna freak out if he finds out about us?"

Jack stifled a laugh. "He might, but he's the least likely to in the entire town. Come to think of it, he probably won't even notice us walk in, cause he's usually sleeping or obsessed with his experiments. Then I can probably get to the stuff he uses for artificial skin."

_________________

As Jack had predicted, the doctor didn't even notice us walk in, even when we lumbered up the stairs like a herd of elephants.

Jack also made quite a lot of noise looking for something he could use to make us look less alive. He finally found a bucket of disgusting-looking greenish purple paste, which he proceded to smear all over our faces. He tried to spread it out evenly- but messed up fantastically, making us look even more zombie-ish. The paste hardened to a rubbery subtance that we could take on and off like a mask, making this all the more easy on us.

"Awesome!" Callie said, inspecting herself in the mirror.

We found some potato sacks and stomped on them and tore them until they looked as though they had been run over by a tractor, or maybe more like five tractors. We sliced holes for the head and arms with my pocket knife and then pulled them on over our clothes.

Jack then handed us a half empty can of red paint. Me and Callie dipped our hands in it and flung it at eachoter until we both looked like we had been through World War one AND two.

"Wow," Jack said monotonously, shaking his head.

"We look good?" Callie asked hopefully.

"No... you look... hideously deformed... and...uhhh...WOW."

Hey, at least it worked.

"CRAP!!" Jack yelled suddenly from behind us as we walked back to his house. Me and Callie spun around.

"What?" Callie asked him, raising an eybrow.

"I totally forgot...I have a family reunion today!!!"

Callie stared at me dumbly.

"Uh... Well..." I was at a loss.

Jack bolted for his house, and the two of us followed. There were a bunch of people standing outside his door, and by the resemblance I assumed they were his family members.


	3. A Family Reunion

The family reunion was, in a word, disastrous. Me and Callie had decided to stay outside to avoid any suspicion, but from where we were sitting under the window I could tell it wasn't going well.

I squeaked as Callie poked me in the side. I had zoned out so she knew she had to get my attention somehow, but unfortunately she had picked the noisiest way. Realizing her mistake, she clapped a hand over my mouth and motioned for me to zip it.

"Did you notice who was there?" She whispered to me. I nodded.  
"Dominikov and Lich. I never would have guessed they were related to Jack."  
"No kidding. I was--"

Callie stopped as she heard the door open. Jack's family was leaving.  
"Already?" I asked in disbelief.  
"Well, it has been an hour."  
"Yeah, but usually family reunions last longer."  
"Maybe Jack sucks at throwing parties."  
I stifled a laugh. It was true that Jack didn't exactly seem like the most organized person in the world. Heck, he had even forgotten the fact that he had a family reunion, so it was obvious that he wouldn't have been prepared.

We both jumped as the window above us flew open.  
"Alright, it's safe for you guys to come in now," Jack said to us. "But do NOT make a big deal out of the fact that you're here. And don't touch anything."

And that's when the Rally X theme began to play.

And it was _loud_, too.

"Where the hell is that stupid music coming from?!" Jack yelled, frantically searching for a source where the annoying little melody was coming from.

The three of us together couldn't find anything.

ONE HOUR LATER...

A knock at the door startled us into hiding in the closet involuntarily. Jack got up and answered the door.

Vira Vilakroma stood in the doorway.  
"What's up? I thought I heard you talking to someone."  
"It's that goddamned music," Jack replied in an irritated voice. When she looked back at him with an uncomprehending stare, he added, "That _music_. Don't you hear it?"  
Her antennae twitched, indicating that she was listening. "No. I don't hear anything."  
Jack shook his head as if that would make the enragingly repetitive song go away, but it didn't.  
"Oh, fine. Well, it was nice talking to you. Bye." Jack slammed the door, but Vira caught it with a clawed hand and forced it open.  
"You're acting really weird. Are you hiding something?"  
"I told you, it's the music. You'd be acting weird too if you had listened to the Rally X theme five hundred times in a row." Almost as if on cue, the song started again. "GAAAHHHH!" Jack yelled, slamming a fist against the wall. It was like the song had a mind of its own, and it was mocking all of us.  
"There's something wrong with you," Vira said, concerned. "You really should go see Doctor Picklestine. I think you might have snapped."  
"Damn right I snapped," Jack growled, now in a furiously homicidal mood. "That song...is....EVIL."

Strangely, in spite of all this, Callie and I had found a way to start another one of our completely random conversations. While we were hiding, no less. It's happened bunches of times before. A spontaneously sparked conversation about the weather had turned into something about fried chicken. Something about homework had been sidetracked to hysterical laughter about finding the word "tits" in a word find. Sometimes, we are so random it scares even me.

Anyhow, this time it was about how I had broken the record for most times falling on my face in a single day. Callie abruptly changed the subject to a rotting hole in the wall of the closet we were sitting in and how it reminded her of swiss cheese.

We were so caught up in talking about falling on our faces and holes in the wall and cheese that we didn't realize that the infernal song had stopped, but more importantly we had completely forgotten that Vira was standing right outside the closet and could hear every word we were saying. We both yelped in surprise when the closet doors flew open and Vira stared at us, dumbfounded.

"What...the..." Vira continued to stare at us, and, not knowing what to do, Callie grinned and waved at her. I smacked her hand back down. At this point, I _knew_ there was something wrong with her. Usually _I_ was the one doing stupid things like that, and she was the one kicking my ass back into line.

"Are they...humans?" Vira asked, turning to Jack.  
"Uhhhhhh...not exactly.....errrr...yeah."  
"How'd they get here?" Vira asked again, looking at us this time.  
"We fell from the moon. HOW DO YOU THINK WE GOT HERE?!" I snapped.  
"...I don't know. And something tells me _you_ don't either."  
I could feel myself going beet red. I light of the situation, what I had just said did indeed sound pretty stupid. Callie snickered.  
"Well, I always pictured humans to look a little more...wimpy."  
"Feh, you overgeneralize," Callie said with a sideways glare. "Not ALL humans are wimpy. Just little kids and preppy girls."  
Vira sighed and turned back to Jack. "You've got some explaining to do..."


	4. Whatever You Do, Don't Panic

And so, Jack did his explaining, and we did ours. Vira didn't seem to believe it for a second. Of course, it's not exactly like I expected her to, either.

But, nonetheless, she heard all three of us out, looking rather amused the whole time.

"And so, now we're here," Callie finished dramatically. Vira yawned.  
"Hmmmm.... Well, it's not exactly like I believe you, but that was one heck of a story. I like the part where the avalanche of chickens came."  
"Yeah?" Callie beamed.  
A clumsy knock at the door interrupted me from saying "But none of that actually HAPPENED!" Jack stood up and opened the door.  
"Hey, Jack," a familiar voice said from the doorway.  
_Yeah, familiar, but TOTALLY out of place._  
Of course, it didn't surprise me. NOTHING could surprise me today.  
"What's this I'm hearing about you having humans with you?" Ultros the octopus asked.  
Jack immediately whipped around, giving both of us a look that said _I am so gonna kill you both right now and don't even try to run away_. I laughed and took out my phone, pulling up the picture I had taken of Callie standing in the street holding a sign that read in huge letters: _We're humans! We're with Jack!_  
"I'll get mad about that later..." Jack grumbled.  
"Nevermind." Ultros pushed his way past Jack and into the house, pausing for a second when he saw me.  
"Hey! I remember YOU!" He said, pointing at me. "Didja beat the game yet?"  
"Huh?"  
"You know, FF6. You're the one who was always writing my lines down, right?"  
"Oh," I said, embarassed. Who knew they could see through the game. "Yeah. I like your lines."  
"Hahaha. Nice to meet a fan face-to-face. Of course, I WANTED to talk to you through the game, but NO, I had to stick to the script." He grinned that unmistakable sharp-toothed octopus grin. "I really like it when I have fans. Most people just think I'm annoying."  
"You're not annoying!" I blurted loudly. "You're just... uh... very repetitive."  
"HAHAHA! YOU GOT THAT RIGHT!" He laughed loudly, slapping me on the back with one of his tentacles. I grinned. Callie shook her head.  
"AHEM, so, anyway," Jack said in an annoyed tone, "How are we gonna get you two home?"  
Callie an I looked at eachother. We hadn't even given any thought to going home yet. We were enjoying ourselves too much.  
"Why go home?" Callie said with a shrug. "I like it here."  
"Yeah, and I don't have to put up with being asked to clean the kitchen every five minutes," I said thoughtfully. Right now, going home was the last thing I wanted to do.  
Jack growled as someone knocked on his door AGAIN. He sure was popular today.  
"WHAT?!?!" He yelled, flinging the door open. "Oh, hi Mayor."  
"Um, Jack, can I talk to you for a minute?" the mayor asked. He sounded upset.  
Vira stood up and walked over to the door after they had gone outside to try and hear what they were saying. When the doorknob turned she scrambled back over to the couch and Jack came in looking annoyed, to say the least. And he even added a sideways deathglare at me and Callie, but I just giggled.  
"No thanks to THEM," he finally said, pointing at us, "I have to go make a speech to the town and tell them what the heck is going on. I guess you guys'll have to come, because it's pointless to try and tell them you don't exist."  
Callie looked at me and we both grinned. Well, that cat was out of that bag.

The town hall was extremely noisy, I could barely hear myself think over the confused blabbering of the townspeople. For a town that's job was to scare everyone else, they sure went into panic mode quickly.  
Callie, Jack and I all walked up onto the stage and the blabbering only got _louder_ when everyone saw us sit down next to the podium. The mayor had a look of complete disbelief on his face.  
"I didn't think the rumors were actually TRUE!" He hissed at Jack. "If I had known there were actually HUMANS here--"  
"Be quiet," Jack growled. "I'm making a speech."  
"EVERYONE BE QUIET!!!" The mayor screamed. "THE PUMPKIN KING IS MAKING A SPEECH!!!"  
The hall was quiet almost instantly.  
"Okay, so, before we go into mass hysteria and assume it's the apocalypse," Jack began, "YES. These ARE humans. But--"  
The crowd all started yelling inaudible things at eachother and panicking, and I had to supress a laugh because the whole thing was starting to seem like a bad, unorganized circus act.  
"QUIET!!!" Jack yelled, banging his fist on the podium. "I'M STILL TALKING!!!"  
Although it wasn't like anyone could HEAR him over their own indignant squealing and panicked yells.  
"EVERBODY SHUT UP!" I yelled at the top of my lungs (which is REALLY loud), standing up so fast my chair fell over.  
They were quiet immediately.  
A few seconds of awkward silence passed.  
"Um..Thanks, I guess," Jack said, startled by my sudden outburst. "So, ANYWAY... As I was saying, yes, these are humans. But it's NOT the end of the world and it's NO BIG DEAL, okaaaay?"  
The townspeople were starting to second-guess him.  
"Okay?!" Jack said again, more forcefully this time.  
"Oh, uh, right," Some people in the crowd said, nervously laughing.  
"Great! With that said," announced the mayor, "Who wants cookies?"


	5. World Domination!

I didn't want to say anything yet, but I had overheard some of the townspeople talking and it didn't exactly seem like they were very confident in Jack.  
"He's pretty nonchalant about this..." Clown said to the person sitting next to him. "I mean, when Oogie was Pumpkin King this kind of thing never happened. Sure, he might not have been very nice to us, but if humans came waltzing in here he'd show them who's boss."  
I thought about that. Fighting skills didn't exactly seem to be a strong point of Jack's, and maybe it was something that was slightly essential to being a good ruler. But we weren't trying to do anything bad. So why did it matter?

"Remind me ONE more time: WHY are we on this SUICIDE mission?"  
"I've already told you five times!"  
"Oh, yeah. We're fighting Oogie to show the town that I'm a better leader."  
"That's RIGHT, Jack," I said with mock-praise. "Someone should give you a prize." He scowled at me.  
When we finally got to Oogie's house, Callie bravely volunteered to go in first, but we ALL wanted to go first. When we were arguing over it, Callie shoved me with a little too much force and we all toppled into eachother and fell down the hole and into Oogie's casino.  
Hey, not exactly a graceful entrance, but we did it.  
"Ow, your foot is in my eye," Callie whined at Jack.  
We all stood up and looked around in that way most heroic heros do. And in the way most villainy villains do, Oogie laughed at us from the other corner of the room, where he had been the whole time.  
"Hey, Jack, long time no see," He said with an evil grin. "Don't tell me-- You brought these pathetic wimps here to help you?"  
"ALRIGHT!" I interrupted loudly. Oogie paused for a second, taken aback that someone as "wimpy" as me would yell at him. "I'm the referee in this fight! The rules are--"  
"But we don't NEED rules to fight eachother!" Oogie protested.  
"THE RULES," I repeated, glaring at Oogie, who decided it best not to question me, "are simple. No weapons. To defeat your opponent, knock him to the ground and keep him there for 10 seconds. Do I make myself clear?"  
"But..." Oogie began.  
"DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?!?!" I screamed. Oogie quickly nodded.  
"Ready....GO!!!"  
The fight didn't last 30 seconds. Needless to say, Oogie had no problem knocking Jack flat on the groung by kicking him in the back of the knees and then keeping him there by standing on him. It was the most pathetic thing I had ever seen.  
"JACK!" I yelled, thoroughly disappointed. "I expected you to last longer than THAT!!! What's wrong with you?!"  
"Sorry," he mumbled, getting up and dusting himself off. Oogie was doubled over with laughter on the other side of the room, unable to say anything.  
When he finally caught his breath, he managed to gasp, "Jack! You MORON! HAHAHA! Do you realize what I just did?!"  
No response.  
"I just BEAT you in a FIGHT!" Oogie said smugly. "Which means...I'M the Pumpkin King now!"  
"WHAT?!" Callie blurted. "THAT'S NOT FAIR!"  
"Yeah!" Jack agreed. "You can't just take my position because you stood on me for 10 seconds!"  
"Oh yes I CAN," Oogie retorted. "It's the RULES. Look it up."  
Oogie handed us _The Official Law and Code of Halloween Town_ and we looked it up. we found the page pretaining to the Pumpkin King title, and read it. Towards the very bottom it said: _"Anyone who beats the current Pumpkin King in a fight of any kind, whether by challenging or by being challenged, is then allowed the title of Pumpkin King along with any possesions the previous Pumpkin King may have had."_  
Oogie laughed even harder when he saw the shocked and disappointed looks on our faces.  
"HAHAHAHA!!! You should have thought about that before you came here, idiots!"

And so, Jack was left without ANYTHING. Pretty much all he had was his clothes and Zero. And it just so happened to be raining pretty heavily that night.  
The three of us and Zero sat on a street corner, miserable and soaking wet, with nothing to look forward to but more rain pouring down on us. None of us said anything for a long time.  
"Sorry, Jack," I said, breaking the silence. "If I wouldn't have come up with that stupid plan, none of this would have happened."  
"That's okay," Jack replied glumly. "It was bound to happen eventually anyway."  
Water splashed me in the face from a foot in a puddle, and when I had wiped it out of my eyes I saw Oogie standing in front of us bearing a particularly nasty grin.  
"What the hell do you want!?" I yelled, feeling that we had dealt with him enough for one day.  
"Oh, nothin' much," He replied. "Just thought I'd see how you were doing. BAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"  
I glared at him.  
"Since you're the loser, Jack, I thought I'd tell you something to make you feel better." Jack glanced angrily in Oogie's direction but pretended not to be listening.  
"_I_ was the one who teleported these humans here. It was all part of my extremely feindishly clever plan to get the town to stop trusting you so that I could become the Pumpkin King. Your little human sidekicks made it SO much easier, though! Thanks a ton for that!"  
Jack was still pretending not to care, but with Oogie's last comment it was getting increasingly hard not to listen.  
"And the show's not over _yet_," Oogie continued in a low voice. He bent over so that he was at eye level with Jack. "You thought I'd stop at Halloween Town, did you? Well that's TOO BAD...because I'm gonna take over the WHOLE WORLD!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" He walked off, laughing to himself.  
"Okay," I said, confused, "what's this about taking over the whole world?"


	6. Uhhh, What

You know you've been watching too much _Shaun of the Dead_ when you wake up and you're surrounded by zombies.  
It took about 30 seconds for me to realize I was still in Halloween Town, but that was long enough for a zombie to catch me off guard and bash my head against the ground. Luckily I wasn't very far from the ground when it did, but it still hurt like hell.  
Callie and Jack were already up, searching for anything they could use as a blunt weapon. Callie managed to yank a gutter pipe off of its mounts and use it to knock off a zombie's head.  
"Unnnhhh..." The zombies groaned.  
"This is WONDERFUL," I heard Jack mutter to himself. "First I lose everything I have, now I'm attacked by zombies."  
I saw a plank of wood on the ground and picked it up, then started wildly swinging it in every direction. Callie was doing the same. Heads, limbs, and peices of bodies were flying everywhere.  
"There's too many!" Callie yelled. "RETREAT!!!"  
So, we ran. But they followed us.  
"UNNNNHHH!!" They groaned again, angry to see that their prey was running.  
"Anyone have any bright ideas?!" I yelled, desperate. We were all still hoplessly swinging at the zombies, but whenever we got rid of one, ten more would take its place.  
"RUN!" Jack yelled.  
"Good idea!" Callie replied.  
And so we ran as fast as we could through town, until we finally came to the main gate. Fortunately for us, it was still open. I ran through and then jumped up and slammed it down as hard as I could, impaling a few zombies. The rest tried reaching at us throught the slats, but then realized it was futile and howled with rage.  
"Hey, I have an idea!" Jack exclaimed suddenly.  
We followed him past yet more hordes of zombies (they were everywhere) and up to a metal door. It took all three of us to slam the heavy door closed because the zombies kept reaching in, with horribly disgusting crunching noises as their arms were crushed. When we finally did get the door closed, we took a minute to catch our breath and drink in what was going on.  
"Alright," I said, gasping for air. "I think...this has something to do with Oogie."  
"No shit, Sherlock," Callie muttered. "Hey, Jack, why'd we come back here, anyway? This is Dr. Picklestein's house."  
"I need to get somehing," Jack replied.  
We shrugged and followed him up the stairs.  
"Doctor, I need my Soul Robber," Jack whined loudly.  
"Fine, take it!" the doctor yelled from upstairs. "Just don't touch anything else!"  
Jack wasn't exactly the best listener in the world. He grabbed the gelatinous glowing green coil off of the table and wrapped it around his wrist, but in the process knocked just about everything else onto the floor. I winced as the glass bottles and test tubes hit the floor, shattering instantly.  
"JACK!!!" Dr. Picklestein yelled. "WHAT ARE YOU BREAKING?!?!"  
"Nothing!" Jack called back. "Let's get out of here," he muttered, heading for the door.  
When we got outside, Callie pointed to the Soul Robber and asked, "What is THAT?"  
"This is Phil," Jack replied smugly.  
"...'Phil'?" What kind of dumb name for a weapon is _Phil_?!" I shot back.  
"HIS NAME IS PHIL!!!" Jack yelled at me, waving the shape-shifting whip in my face. "GOT A PROBLEM?!"  
"Yeah, well..." Callie said, interrupting our argument, "How's that pile of Jello gonna help us fight zombies?"  
"Like so," Jack said, opening the door. As a zombie saw him standing there out in the open and charged, the Soul Robber extended and wrapped around the zombie's leg. Before the zombie could even wonder what had just grabbed it, Jack yanked the Soul Robber back and slammed the zombie into the ground. Blood and guts flew everywhere.  
"Okay, you've convinced me," Callie said, wiping blood off her face. "Now let's get out of here."


	7. Mafia Madness

"We're going to start a Mafia!" I exclaimed after the zombies were a reasonable distance away. "And I'll be the leader."  
"Okay," Jack said agreeably, "but there's only three of us."  
"Spread out!" I said in my best leaderly voice. "Recruit anyone who doesn't look evil!"

An hour later, our Mafia included me, Callie, Jack, Ultros, Biggs and Wedge, Dr. Luage, Dominikov, Pete Armstrong, Balnob the giant robot, Luke Skywalker, Optimus Prime, and a whole ton of other people.

(YES I KNOW NONE OF THEM ARE IN TNBC!!! KEEP READING!!!)

I stood atop the spiral hill and pumped my fist in the air. "OKAY, TROOPS!" I shouted as loud as I could. "WE ARE NOW A MAFIA!!!"  
There was a deafening roar as they all cheered.  
"AND I'M THE LEADER!!!"  
There was uncertain chatter, then the army cheered again.  
Dominikov stepped forward. "Why are we a Mafia again? Jack didn't quite explain that to me when he asked me to join."  
"We're a Mafia because we're opposing Oogie!" I replied.  
"Ah," Dominikov answered, and stepped back into the crowd.  
"Operation one," I continued, "Involves some skill at burglary. Come forward if you think you're good enough!"  
Optimus Prime, Luke Skywalker, Dominikov, and Ultros stepped up.  
"Great!" I turned to Callie. "You keep the rest of the Mafia under control. I'll come get you when it's time for operation two. Jack, you come with me."

"Okay, we are now at the enemy's base! First we have to disarm this security system--"  
"Ooh, ooh! I've always wanted to do this!" Luke interrupted. He put on a good scowl, stood squarely in front of the door, and kicked it as hard as he could.

The door was unchanged, but Luke's foot had seen better days.

"Well, that was stupid," I said matter-of-factly, taking out my laser gun and blasting the keypad to peices. The door flew open with a _WHOOSH!_ noise. We were in.

Well, to be accurate, MOST of us were in. Optimus was too big to fit through the door and had to sit outside.

"Well, I see you were all smart enough to make your way in here," the unmistakable voice of Darth Vader said slowly. "But it is of no matter, for you shall soon perish--AAAAGGGGHHH!!!" He looked down at the gaping hole in his chest and died.  
"Nice work," I said to Ultros, giving him a thumbs-up as he put his gun away. "Now we can get to the controls."  
"Why do I get the feeling that guy was my father or something?" Luke asked. We all shrugged.  
"What's the password?!" I yelled demandingly, trying to think of anything it could be.  
"Uh, is that it?" Jack asked, pointing to a huge sign on the wall that read: _In case any of you forget the password, it's FLUFFY PUPPIES._  
"Fluffy puppies?!" I yelled. "What kind of password is that?! And why did Oogie put up a sign?!"  
"Beats me," Jack replied. "Try typing it in."  
I typed it in. A huge smiley face popped up on the screen and a voice said:  
"Thank you for activating this base's self destruct feature! Please enjoy your last few precious seconds of life!"  
"Oh CRAP!!!" I yelled.  
"_That's_ why Oogie put up a sign," Dominkov said in an I-told-you-so voice.  
I whipped around and glared at him.  
"RUUUUUNNN!!!" Jack yelled. None of us needed to be told twice.  
We managed to get about 200 yards before the base exploded, sending us flying.  
"WOW," Ultros said, thoroughly impressed. "It blew up the whole mountain!"  
Behind the mountain were five shiny new starfighters, each big enough to hold 4 people.  
Unfortunately, Optimus hadn't managed to figure out why we were running, and had been blown up along with Oogie's base, the mountain, and the surrounding area.  
"Well, that's Mafia business for you," I said with a shrug. "But there's no point in getting upset over little things like exploded comrades, right?"  
Me, Jack, Dominikov, Luke, and Ultros each climbed into a starfighter and flew back to the spiral hill to announce that we had not only blown up the enemy's base, but stolen their starfighters as well.  
The rest of the Mafia cheered as we landed our starfighters. I jumped out and held up my hand for silence.  
"Operation two involves flying through space to the Big Scary Spaceship-Ball From Beyond the Stars, where Oogie is currently taking refuge!"  
"But we'll be killed!" Luke yelled. "It's much too dangerous!"  
"ARE YOU QUESTIONING ME?!" I yelled back, lunging at him.  
"No ma'am! I mean, yes ma'am, but..."  
"JACK!!!" I called. "ELIMINATE THE TRAITOR!!!"  
Jack took out a shotgun and that was the end of Luke.  
"ANYONE ELSE WANT TO QUESTION ME?!" I yelled at the crowd.  
"NO MA'AM!!" They replied in unison.  
"Good..." I said with an ominous pause. "Let operation two begin!"


	8. The Final Showdown

"Hey, Meghan, I have a question," Callie asked as we rocketed through the sky at amazing speed.  
"Shoot," I replied.  
"How'd you know where Oogie was?"  
"I'm the author of this story. I know EVERYTHING," I said, waving my finger at her.  
"No you don't," Jack said with a scowl.  
"Oh yes I _do_," I corrected, glaring at him from the rear-veiw mirror.  
"Fine. So where do we go next?" He asked.  
"Uhhhh....Um...."  
"Commander!" Luage's voice came in on the radio. "I've spotted enemy ships!"  
"What?!" I yelled back. "Take them out!"  
"Yes, ma'am!" Luage replied. I saw blasts fired out of the corner of my eye. A loud explosion sounded from the radio.  
"No!" I heard Ultros yell. "Commander!!! We've lost Luage and Balnob!!"  
"Damn!" I said, banging my fist on the dashboard. "Ultros, can you fly the ship?!"  
"I-I think so!" He stuttered. "There's a huge hole in the front, though!"  
"Just fly it!" I commanded.  
"Yes, ma'am!"  
"Wait..." I said, confused. "Ultros, if there's a huge hole in the ship, how can you breathe?!"  
"I don't know, ma'am!"

We all landed on the Big Scary Spaceship-Ball From Beyond the Stars safely, (Save for Luage and Balnob, who had been killed instantly in the enemy blast) however, we still had no idea where to go.  
"Let's go... THAT WAY!" Ultros declared, pointing in 6 different directions. I smacked my forehead.  
"HALT!!!" A guard yelled, sounding particularly annoyed. "Who goes there?!"  
"Who the hell are YOU?" I asked him. He looked like some kind of Matrix nerd.  
"I am Maximus Williams!" He replied dramatically. "Who are YOU?"  
Dominikov stepped forward. "I am the grim reaper," He said in a deep, scary voice. "Maximus Williams, I have come for your soul."  
To top it all off, he added an evil, maniacal laugh at the end.  
"Wh-What is this...?!? AHHHHHH!!!" and Maximus Williams took off running.  
"That is SO much fun," Dominikov chuckled to himself.  
"Let's stop wasting time and GO," I said, rolling my eyes and walking through the door that Maximus Williams had carelessly left open.  
When we got inside we all heard the unmistakable shrill laughter of the three evil children that worked for Oogie.  
"Lock! Shock! Barrel!" Callie yelled dramatically. (Yes, there is a lot of dramatic yelling in this chapter.) "Why are you doing this?!"  
"Haven't you figured it out yet?" Lock replied. "We're evil! It's what we do!"  
"And there was nothing good on TV..." Barrel added, grumbling.  
"Let's beat them up!" Shock giggled.  
I may not have a black belt in karate or anything, but when it comes to my babysitting skills I am known as The Scary Babysitting Woman from Hell.

(Callie: Pffft. Yeah RIGHT! Me: DX SHUT UP!!!)

"JACK! GET ME THE SHOTGUN!" I exclaimed, causing the three of them to pause.  
"Suuuure," Jack said, handing me the rifle.  
"Bad kids should be punished," I said in my best evil voice, cocking the gun.  
"Ummmm..." Barrel started to back up a little bit.  
"WHO WANTS TO BE PUNISHED FIRST?!" I yelled at them, causing them to squeak and run away. It was actually pretty amusing to watch them crying and running into eachother, desperate to get away.  
"Onward!" I declared, handing the gun back to Jack. And the Mafia marched on.

"If we don't make it out of here, it's Jack's fault," I whispered before we went in to fight Oogie.  
"HEY!" Jack yelled angrily at me, but I slapped a hand over his mouth.  
"Let's go!"  
And so, the Mafia marched into the room.  
"I could hear every word you were saying, you know," Oogie said when we walked in, exasperated.  
"Yeah, I know."  
"Well, I guess you came to kill me?"  
"Yep."  
"WELL I HAVE BACKUP!!!" Oogie retorted. "HEY, BACKUP!!! GET OVER HERE!!!"  
"What do you want NOW?" Shiki asked, sounding irritated as he walked in, followed by Durham.  
"Destroy this Mafia for me," Oogie ordered.  
There was a long pause.  
"You, know, I don't really like you anymore," Durham said. He pointed his gun at Oogie and pulled the trigger. There was a huge explosion and peices of Oogie flew everywhere.  
Well, that was the end of that.

"I have to say, I really enjoyed being the leader of this Mafia!" I announced when we were back in Halloween Town. "But I have to go home now. Sorry."  
There was a string of disappointed "Awww"s from the crowd.  
"And I'm the Pumpkin King again!" Jack said happily.  
"Hold on," Durham interrupted. "_I_ was the one who beat Oogie. Doesn't that technically make _me_ the Pumpkin King?"  
"Wh-what?" Jack stammered. "But but but but-- That's not fair!!! I thought you were my friend!!!"  
"What ever happened to 'I don't want to be the Pumpkin King anyway'?" Durham grumbled.  
"WELL I CHANGED MY MIND!!!" Jack yelled at him.  
"Okay, okay! Jeez. Talk about mood swings..."  
"ARE YOU CALLING ME A GIRL?!?!?"  
"Yes."  
"...HEY!!!"  
Callie and I both laughed. Well, it looked as though everything was back to normal. There was still the problem of finding out how to get home, though...

**THE END...?**


End file.
